Recently, I provided a link for a 60 minutes video relating to people in their nineties. Millions in federal funds were used for research that provided the basis for the video. The purpose of the video was to peek into the lives of the “oldest old”.

Hosted by Lesley Stahl, it was generally well done, but typically, it omitted something important. (I’ll get to that in a bit.) So here is what I learned from the retirees and the research in the video:

*A few retirees took food supplements, but that was not the norm.

*They liked their alcohol and desserts, drove their car, played bingo, and performed group chair exercises.

*They were generally happy and had fun.

*Mental and physical decline was evident.

* Lesley Stahl asked one couple about their sex life. They were embarrassed and didn’t want to talk about it. Why should they —  who cares? What if they asked Lesley about HER sex life?  (Why is it okay to speak to elders as if they are brain deficient children or morons?  The question is not appropriate. Their sex life is nobody’s business.  It was condescending and not cute, It was damn disrespectful. It makes me mad as hell!)

So, what was missing? After all the federal research funds committed to understanding what makes old people tick, there was nothing about preventing decline. No credence was given to the reality that if you don’t use it, you will lose it!  

The decline of retirees starts with our retirement system that grants retirement to those 65 or younger. At age 65, most people are tired of work and look forward to living a life of leisure. That’s okay, but under the cover, it’s diabolical. Typical retirement is an early death sentence or a life of misery for many who did not sufficiently pre-plan. Decline sets in early and it’s insidious. It takes over your body so slowly, you don’t notice. You don’t realize what has happened until it is obvious.

Before retirement, in addition to having a financial plan, plan how you want to spend the next 20-30 {or more) years of your life. Many life longer than expected! Have a plan that includes moderate recreation and activities that keep the brain firing on all cylinders. Staying busy with daily chores doesn’t count very much because they don’t require deep brain activity. Your plan may not fully come to life, but if even some of it comes to pass, that’s a huge win.

You may know of Sarah Oliver, a woman who paid retirees in a retirement community in California to knit handbags for sale. In effect, those retired women (and one man) became entrepreneurs, and most importantly, they came back to life. Their faces lit up, and they had a new confident demeanor. They had to THINK and produce. They had a new purpose in life beyond bingo and playing cards. They had to fire up a dulled, sleeping brain, and they loved it. But, unfortunately, the government got involved and shut down the operation because Big Brother decided that what Sarah Oliver was doing was not fair to her workers. Government requirements and benefits were not provided.

Most people at age 65 are still young. Tired and sick of work? Yes. But they can usually control their lives. At retirement, they should be encouraged to get into and stay in an exercise program until the end of life. But that’s not what happens! Aging experts don’t suggest exercise until you are worn out from having fun. By that time, you are too tired to even think about exercise. When you get to age 90, it is not the time to try to force an inactive body to work out on a Total Gym or other exercise equipment. You buy a Total Gym before or when you retire. Even then, you may find simple exercises are hard to do,  but it’s easier than if you try to start to use the system at age ninety.

As for diet, given the pressure we are under to buy and eat junk advertised on TV, you have to take the bull by the horns and do independent research on what constitutes superior nutrition that will support your mind and body until the end. It’s not complicated — it just requires determination and the realization that if you live the way the general culture lives or says you should live,  you may become one of those older adults who drag their brain (what’s left of it) behind them.

It is true that however much you do to stay vibrant and healthy in your oldest years, CRAP WILL HAPPEN in one way or another, usually the result of an inherited deficit. In my case, scoliosis has finally caught up with my back. So, no, I will not have surgery — I will use my Total Gym to build more strength to overcome my genetic deficits.

You may not know that Star Trek adventurer William Shatner is now 90. He has sleep apnea, but it has not kept him from WORKING. During the Medicare sign-up period, he was on TV pitching Medicare services. He currently hosts  “The Unexplained. ” Work doesn’t kill us; we kill ourselves with the way we live and think.

I am in accord with Dr. David A Sinclair, Ph.D. who posits in his book, Lifespan: Why We Age — and Why We Don’t Have To that aging, referring to the passage of time and not chronological age, is a disease, primarily a result of how we live and think over the years. If you put together all the pieces of how we live our lives, you conclude that he is right. Too often, we are our own worst enemy. Please, stop thinking about how old you are. After you are done having babies, chronological age is a meaningless and useless number.

We need the will to take charge of our lives while we can do it. Get Sinclair”s book and read it. You will be thrilled to know there are so many simple things you can do, that have a considerable payoff long term. Devastating mental and physical decline is not inevitable. We all can make our lives, especially our older years, more joyful and valuable for ourselves and others by thinking and acting ahead early on in our lives. The good news is, if you haven’t done that, please don’t despair. As long as we are alive we can make positive changes if we have the will to do so.

 

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It’s Barbara’s 93rd birthday!

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