Kids and grandkids aren’t the only ones who need to beware of predators on dating sites! The same applies to ‘old folks’ who might be reaching out of loneliness to dating sites. This COULD be a wonderful way for ‘seniors’ to meet other seniors and in some cases, it probably is. Even if one is not looking for marriage or long-term relationships, a new ‘friend’ might be mined from these groups. I have learned, however, that there are those whose purpose is other than meeting or greeting someone new; too many will ‘take advantage’ of anyone, especially an older person. Please be careful!
Over the last six years I have joined three different sites…but would delete my account after a week or so. I joined for one month, aware that I would know something or someone by then. In some ways it is pleasant to read about others and the things that are meaningful to them. Of course, everything mentioned sounds positive. No one will say, “I am a big phony; come on down!” We learn not to believe all that we are told. I imagine many are successful in their search but I was not. Maybe I am too ‘picky’. I do know when I should ‘get out of there’.
Our experiences should teach us something, whatever these involve…, and in reading that sentence again, I realize that I should be the smartest great-grandma in the U.S.A. oh, well. Some of the things I’ve learned from dating sites (a total of less than 30 days) as well as from life are:
People are seldom what we want to believe they are. I still want to believe that most people are honest but, actually, they are not. They will tell you anything to gain something they want. Just because YOU are honest, remember that everyone isn’t. On these dating sites, don’t give too many PERSONAL DETAILS about yourself. Don’t give your e-mail address, though if you do, as another way of communication, you CAN BLOCK any unwanted e-mail messages. Also, DON’T give your phone number, regardless of the many reasons you are given. If you do give it, five minutes later you might receive a call that is more than obscene. As you imagined ‘oh, I think he will be very nice’, you are shattered to hear the filthy language over your phone. He won’t ask you name or ‘how are you?’ – but he will tell you what he has in mind. Instead of the 80-year-old, mature and sensible guy you are hoping for, he sounds like a not very bright 17-year-old jerk. It happens if we aren’t careful; this will ruin the gift of your day.
I’m not looking for money or even marriage. It would be nice to have a dining partner and/or one who can share an intelligent conversation or chat. I will simply READ MORE and WRITE MORE if I can’t enjoy the pleasant company of another. We know that not everyone is pleasant.
I enjoyed chuckles as I realized that those nearby (less than 50 miles) were not very interested but those far, far away were ready almost immediately to re-locate. H-m-n-n-m. This is on the first chat! I am vocal about being 82 – BUT too many in their 40s and 50s seemed too eager. I wonder WHY these would waste their time trying to ‘get-to-know’ an 82-year-old? Several thoughts come to mind but these are not uplifting thoughts. These probably think I am a stupid old lady (easy to manipulate) while I am at my computer thinking that they are stupid or cunning or devious. Time for me to delete my account; I don’t want any more of any of that. I would rather be alone.
Actually I enjoy my life and the things I do; I am never bored and seldom lonely. My days are full; I am thankful for the sense of accomplishment and have no plans to sit and do nothing. THAT would kill me! My mind is alert and open for new ideas. It is almost an exciting game to wonder what I can do next!
Anyway I learned, in reading all those ‘profiles’, that few enjoy READING the way I do. Maybe it is a good thing I am alone; NOTHING or NO ONE will take away my reading time. So there!
Lura Zerick an 82-year-old great grandmother enjoys learning new things. Give her an Elvis song with a good beat and watch her go! Her favorite things are reading, listening to music, singing, cooking/baking, birds and words. She enjoys 12 great grandchildren and 6 great grand children; loves to encourage them o cook, write and sing, as well as use their other abilities. She can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org
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