Is It a Breaking Point or a Turning Point?

Joyce Shafer

Joyce Shafer

There are crossroad moments in life, but there are also moments that have a stronger dynamic than that. These are moments when you face major decisions about giving up or giving out or going forward in life.

“A crisis only becomes a breaking point when we fail to use it as a turning point,” wrote Guy Finley. Most of us have had a moment when we faced, or may now face, this truth. Depending on what’s going on, we can feel weakened, either momentarily or for longer; and we may have to dig deep for the courage and self-love to head toward the direction of a balance point. Along with this, it takes an act of courage to reach out to others when we feel weakened so that we can get strong again, as author and motivational speaker Les Brown reminded us. That’s not always easy or comfortable to do, especially if you have self-worth issues about your deservedness or a belief that you have to be perceived as perfect, which means you erroneously believe you must never have or demonstrate feelings other than those of empowerment.

Sometimes, what gets us to feel we’re approaching a breaking point is a series of events that seem to pile up. Sometimes, it’s one event. Sometimes, it’s both, which has been my recent experience. Either scenario can make us feel that we’re going to break open or break apart. That’s why I was especially appreciative to reread Finley’s and Brown’s words. I’ve had to reach out to select others lately, in order to stay strong during a particularly challenging time. I’ve had to look at my role in the dynamics and own it, which has been painful but transforming; but doing this empowers me in many ways. What I’ve been facing can be viewed as a problem (breaking point) or as an impetus (turning point) to do something that’s needed to be done for quite a while. In its specific way, my situation is a signal to turn and aim my life in a direction that is more appropriate for me, as though I can hear the words whispered on the wind, “Your life is calling you.” Along with the emotions I’ve experienced, I’ve also been able to see the gifts and the hand of Source at work for my and the highest good.

It’s somewhat frightening and exhilarating to stand in this place. Like that phrase that refers to leaping and finding you can fly. The encouraging words of support and love that have been coming to me from family and friends, and messages sent by Source in its very special way, help me remember how blessed I am in my life, how much I have to appreciate. And I realize one of the biggest blessings is that I can recognize this.

I haven’t popped right into “positive energy and emotions only” mode as yet, nor will I put that unrealistic demand or burden on myself: There are still things to resolve and healing work to be done. I know that staying in an agitated state won’t fix anything and is potentially damaging to the body, as well as every area of life. Einstein’s words come back to me, “No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it.” I can’t keep doing the same things and expect different results; none of us can. And I can tell you that making specific changes has not been received well by one and all, though, support for the needed changes is strong from others; though, that shouldn’t be required in order for any of us to take strength in any choice we make that’s in our best and highest interest. In fact, making specific changes has set other dynamics into motion, as is wont to happen; but I completely trust Source to continue to support me, as well as act for the highest good of all involved.

Why is it that we sometimes feel compelled to wait to make changes until we have to? I’m one who believes everything has a purpose, so there’s no judgment in that question. I can think of lots of reasons we might do that. Sometimes the reasons include being a kind, caring person who doesn’t like to give up, which means the person also doesn’t know that necessary endings are natural and, well, necessary, whether that’s a complete ending or ending only what doesn’t work. Sometimes it’s because a co-dependent (toxic) relationship has been formed, whether personal or professional, and any number of fears get in the way, preventing a needed shift from happening. Sometimes it’s because we live from the outside in rather than from the inside out, which puts the quality of our life into the hands of others instead of in our own hands and in partnership with Source. Sometimes it’s to get our attention onto an inner healing that is needed, which of course could result in any or all of the above reasons I listed here. I’m certainly now aware of my reasons, and I’m directing my energy in a way that lets me move forward, however this challenge unfolds.

If you experience a moment, or are in one now, that feels like a breaking point, what might you do to make it your turning point? It’s a good practice, one you’ll appreciate.

Practice makes progress.
© Joyce L. Shafer

You are welcome to use this article in your newsletter or on your blog/website as long as you use my complete bio with it.

Joyce L. Shafer is a Life Empowerment Coach dedicated to helping people feel, be, and live their true inner power. She’s author of “I Don’t Want to be Your Guru, But I Have Something to Say” and other books/e-books, and publishes a free weekly online newsletter that offers empowering articles. See all that’s offered by Joyce and on her site at

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